Indigo Adults and Sexual Relationships – Part 2

indigo_adult_sexual_romantic_relationshipsAs an empathic indigo adult my romantic relationships have always self-destructed around month six and I always considered that a failure on my part.

Why couldn’t I have long term romantic relationships? What was it about that type of relationship that made me uncomfortable?

There is a guy that I have been hanging out with since I moved to Chicago.

I thought he was cute when I met him and I’m pretty sure he thought that about me.

But I was quite resistant to moving forward with anything in a romantic way. This seems to be on par with my behavior for the last year or so and I thought it was an indication that I had not yet fully released my last romantic relationship.

I also kept telling myself I disliked aspects of this Chicago guy’s personality. These aspects were fine to me as friends but would grade on me if we became lovers.

And then I found out that he’s moving across the country next week.

He suddenly became a lot more attractive.

I’m still not interested in pursuing anything further than friendship with him, but the important information here for me is that by him leaving it made me getting closer to him easy and safe.

The more I have looked at my indigo adult abilities, the more I have realized that this has to do with being empathic.

Usually by month six there is such a blending of energies, that the non-empathic partner’s desires and wishes become my desires and wishes and what I want and what I’m working towards in my life ends up dissappearing.

And when I’m dating another empath it’s even more bazaar because I start to want his goals and desires and he starts wanting mine and we look at each other and think to ourselves, “What the heck is going on here?!”

Anyway, with this guy that is leaving in a week…

He is now safe and comfortable to me because even if we were to now totally blend together in mind and body in this next week, his leaving would allow me to stay on my own path.

If I got caught up in his mental/physical/emotional energy, I wouldn’t get caught up in his energy for very long.

He’d leave and that would give me space to feel completely into my own core again.

I have always been drawn to individuals that lived far away from me or were moving away from me soon and now I understand why.

I’m not sure if this quirk in my behavior and romantic interest will ever change because I’m pretty sure I was born an empath, and while I’ve gotten better at turning off the empathy, in close relationships, such as one with a lover, it seems like no amount of willpower is going to shut out my partners affect on my energy, mood and thinking.

But now that I am aware of this at least I can find someone that also likes being a long distance partnership.

Are there any indigo adults… specifically EMAPTHIC indigo adults… that are in romantic relationships that are working? Can you share your secrets to keeping your energy clear? I know this would help me and I’m sure this would help other indigo adults as well.

Thanks!

~ Peace ~

Indigo Leslie

PS: Here is part 1 of this post series: Indigo Adults and Sexual Relationships – Part 1

4 thoughts on “Indigo Adults and Sexual Relationships – Part 2”

  1. Hi Leslie

    I don’t have any secrets, but I thought I’d share with you my circumstances. My husband and I have been together 6 years next month and married 3 years, as of the same day. It was very rocky in our first 6 months to a year as I experienced a lot of what you discribed above. It is sometimes hard to keep the sharing of a new experience and enjoying that and taking it on as a new interest with the energy taking over and feeling no control over this “new interest” straight.
    I honestly have to thank my husband for his strength and guarded ways. I have just recently come to realize that I am an Indigo Adult and finally many experience throughout my life make much more sense.
    My husband is a very guarded individual and only shares parts of himself with those truly dedicated to trying to get to know him and really forcing him to share his feelings and thoughts on topics. I honestly think this is why we have lasted, in the beginning it took lots of time and energy to get him to open up, but it was always very breif and never overwhelming for me. I am a truly empathic person and I have had to end relationships because I take on too much of another persons energy, usually negativel, and I realize that I am not healthy or happy anymore. My husband is a very strong person both physically and emotionally and I truly think this has sustained us both. I can embrace his emotions when needed, when he has a bad day the first thing he does when I get home is ask for a hug and I can feel him pouring himself into me and coming back to himself more whole, it can be exhuasting at the moments, but once his replenished he is again the rock to which I can tether myself.
    Also we have always been open with our differences of beliefs, my husband is a very skeptical agnostic, where as I am very spiritual and open. We appreciate these qualities in each other and I think being able to share those aspects with each other has helped us to stay connected and also healthily seprate. Being a couple is about coming together as a partnership, you need to recognize each other’s short comings and positive attributes. The only way to truly be a successful partnership is to bring your stregths together to counteract your short comings, this has been very true since our son was born in 2010. Our strengths as parents are very different but very complimentary.

    Thank you for sharing and I hope my ramblings made some sense to you.

    Candace

  2. Oh yeah… I hear ya!!! I must say that I’ve never had a normal relationship that lasted more than a few months. For example, a guy I’ve been having strong strong chemistry for years now, has never been able to be with me. I’m talking crazy chemistry. All my “relationships” so far have been dramatic, weird, and I keep dreaming of love, but never seem to fall in love. Well, except this chemistry guy, I can’t even be myself in his presence, my brain just shuts down. Most guys are boring to me, simple, programmed, brainwashed, stupid, humorless, passionless… Or is it me, am I nuts or smth? I just can’t date someone I feel no passion for… And real passion is very rare, at least I see it that way.

  3. I have am 47 and have never been in a serious relationship. I have been committed to god and celibacy by choice, and haven’t been able to make the transition to intimacy with men.

    The emotional confusion of getting close to people is overwhelming and claustrophobic. I can help with my words, my presence and my energy, but rarely do I feel that anyone else can help me energetically. So being with people, especially intimately, feels exhausting.

    I would like to experience that kind of connection, but don’t know that I trust the energy of other human beings enough. Like Candace said, it would have to be someone rock solid who goes slooooooooow. Otherwise, all circuits go on overload.

  4. Leslie, there are so many things to say about this topic that i don’t even know where to begin. I guess all i’m going to talk about are the basic guidelines that “separate” people on an energetic level. You being an indigo and an empath, by definition, are of a different vibration then most people on planet earth, so that mean that whenever you come in contact with another person be it indigo or of a different energy vibration, you cannot help but get merged with that person’s auric field. I know this, I am an empath like you and I have come to realize that it is of the utmost importance, give the huge differences in energy here on planet earth, to be very selective of whom you come in contact with, otherwise you are “doomed” to feel some people that are really not rezonating with you and they just make you feel sort of bad on the inside, simply by the fact that most of them are not so pure and aware of themselves as indigos are.
    So I guess in my point of you, i’d suggest you to be selective so you don’t have to keep cleaning your aura after each interaction with people. If you find some people sexually attractive and you sense them not being an indigo, then you should see what definitions you have about sexuality and romance.

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